”“Your accent...”“Guatemala. I have been in America three years.”“You speak very well. I doubt that three years in Guatemala would do as well for me.”She smiled. “You might be surprised. But I was raised in an orphanage run by an American family...”“Interesting,” I said.“It is a long story.”“Is it something you tell? I’d like to hear...”Our conversation was interrupted by the expedient of the professor’s teaching assistant opening the door. “If you two are here about Number Four on last week’s worksheet, the solution on the website is wrong. We just posted the correct one...”“I am inconvenienced,” Carlita said. “Not only am I inconvenienced, but I have inconvenienced my husband.”Well, since she’s getting expressive, so will I. “Me too. Dad. Step-mom – both engineers. All three of us came up with the same answer and it WASN’T yours...”“We screwed up. I’m sorry,” he said.My turn to step up. “Okay, then how about letting me take the final and I’ll forget this...”Carlita flicked her eyes. Was I going to get killed? Was I going to get arrested? Was I going to chicken out as soon as the guy opened the door? I have to admit the thrill was a real turn on.”“Was he nice?” I asked.“He was so sweet,” she said. “He treated me like a princess. He kept on telling me over and over how pretty I was. He took my self-esteem to the next level.”“Does Andy know you did that?” I asked laughing.“God no,” she said. “If he knew half the things I did he’d want his ring back.”“I have no idea why you’re marrying him,” I asked as I started to get out of the car.“That’s easy,” she said. “He’s rich and travels a lot for work, which means I get to have my cake and eat it too.”“You’re a bitch,” I said as we walked into the restaurant.“And a whore,” she said laughing.Several hours later I was back home, sitting on my couch swiping left and right on Tinder. Pretty quickly I matched with a really cute guy from Scottsdale. I then wrote him a message. And as I was waiting for him to respond I started.
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