Emotionally, I was still torn. I was ridden with guilt, and shame. It was difficult to have an experience that was so pleasurable, so satisfying and exciting, and so all consuming; but yet was so shameful.While I felt incredibly close to Gary, in many ways our relationship isolated me from my friends. There was no one I could talk to about my wonderful discoveries. If anyone were to find out, life as I knew it would come to a screeching halt. And knowing that if any of my friends knew what Gary and I were doing, I would be labeled a pervert or a monster, placed a heavy burden on my emotional well being.All day, every day at school, I was highly distracted. I seemed to be constantly wet and aroused either thinking about what Gary and I had recently done, or in anticipation of what we would do that evening. I noticed that by the end of my school day, the crotch of my panties was damp with the constant leakage from my aroused vagina. Prior to Gary and my discovery of each other, this. I then did the same for her to make her lips look more nearly normal. "You'd better sit down," Mom warned, staring at my huge bulge. "Nobody could miss that."In a few moments Sis had joined us in the kitchen. She was as merry as Christmas and obviously had had a good time. "How was Chris?" I asked, wiggling my eyebrows in Groucho Marx style."How WAS Chris?" Sis echoed, getting my drift. "Well, as Tony the Tiger would say, Chris was GRRRRREAT!"We all laughed, and of course Sis had to have a piece of pie and a cup of hot chocolate, and she sat there yakking till finally Mom said good night and went upstairs. Damn! Damn! Damn! There went my chance! Would I ever get another one?In just a few minutes Sis went to bed also. I went into the living room and sat down on the sofa in the semi-darkness, with just the dim light from a street lamp coming in through the window. God! If we had only got started sooner! If Mom had only given me a chance during the day, when we would have had several.
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