"I know," Jocelyn replied. Tears were beginning to stream down her face."You'd give it the love it deserves. You're a loving and caring girl,Sharon, which is why I love you so much."Sharon got up and walked over to Jocelyn's side of the table. She puther arm around her shoulder and laid her head against her lover's."I love you, too," she said. "I'm just a little afraid. What if thingsdon't work out?" Even if they didn't, you'd still be better off living as Sharon than asRay." I'll think about it."She cleaned up and did the dishes, then she went to take a long bubblebath. As she luxuriated in the lilac-scented water, she tried to thinkabout what she would want if she went back to living as Ray, but shedrew a blank. Then she tried to imagine living alone as Sharon. A fewideas emerged, but not very specific.After her bath, she toweled off and then put the soft towel to her faceand inhaled the lovely scent. Flowers! That's what the house needed,along with other soft, feminine touches.. Usually it was one or two out of four. Four out of four only once before, when she’d married the second time. As they left occasional phone messages for each other she found his voice thrilling. Such a child, she thought, to save his voicemails for play back over and over. She could imagine that voice soaring over the others in church, and wondered what it would be like to stand next to him in her choir, instead of next to Arthur McNair, whose voice was strong like his, but not sexy. And now he was coming here. Or rather, to central Connecticut. A mere hundred miles away, rather than thousands. She tracked his progress across the skies by computer and when he briefly touched down in her city, she fleetingly thought of going to the airport, just to see him. Maybe say hello. Probably not. She hadn’t told him she was going to do it, didn’t know how he would respond. Besides – she wouldn’t have been allowed at the gate. Even after he casually mentioned meeting at a baseball game, she.
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