4
.. go down on him.” “And you are not ready for that?” “No I am,” I began, my brain racing. Did I just tell my dad that I was ready to give head to my not so boyfriend? How much stupider could I get? “I mean.” “Then why don’t you? If that is what you both want.” “I don’t..” I was not sure how to answer him. “You don’t want to talk about this anymore?” He asked me. “No.” I tried to think of how to stay this to my dad. “I don’t know um ... how.” “You don’t know how what?” He asked, followed by a look of realization shortly after his words left his mouth. “You have never done this before?” “No, of course not, what do you think I am? A whore?” “Not at all, I just figured you had probably done a lot of things by now.” “Well I haven’t and I am scared that I am going to do it horribly.” My dad was quiet for a few minutes. I thought that maybe I had freaked him out just a little. What father really wanted to hear about their daughters thoughts about giving head to her not so boyfriend. People have such short memories. Many Black men have gone down due to being accused of sexual misconduct by white women throughout American history. Whether they’re innocent or guilty, once those broads accuse them, they’re finished. I’m not trying to end up like them. To me, these white broads are more trouble than they’re worth. Interracial dating isn’t for me. Let some other adventurous Black men try it. There are so many gorgeous Black women at the Deval Patrick College campus. My preference is for tall, curvy and big-bottomed, dark-skinned Black women. I have always loved Black women. Growing up, I had pictures of Janet Jackson, Toni Braxton and Pam Grier in my room. I’ve never been one to lust after the likes of Sharon Stone, Jennifer Lopez or any other non-Black starlets. Yet when I approach these Black women on campus, they’re really not feeling me. This has caused me to take a hard look at myself. Rejection can happen to any man. It’s all about what you do afterwards. You.
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